150313 : 50 ways to make your husband happy

I found this article just now and I think it is a great and must-share article especially to wife, newly-wed and bride to be out there. So check it out.
____________________________________________________

1. Start with a love letter. Remember how eagerly you waited in the early days of your courtship to receive a letter or just a note from each other? Do it again, but this time count all the reasons, which you think make him the best husband. Your man will not only be happy to be reminded of your love but glad to know that he makes you happy as well.
2. Listen actively. When your husband expresses an opinion or a thought, pay attention. This shows you respect him and his views and nothing pleases a man more.
3. Say thank you with a smile. When your husband does an odd job around the house, thank him like you really mean it. He will know that his help is not taken for granted and he will be happy to do more.
4. Prepare his favorite meal. After he returns home from work on an ordinary day, surprise your husband with his favorite dinner.  He will not only be glad to have the food he likes best, but will appreciate the time and effort you put in preparing it.
5. Let him have the TV remote. Granted, that you wish your husband spent more time with you, than watching the sports channel, but if there is an important game that you know your husband would love to watch, hand over the TV remote graciously.
6. Hold his gaze. When you are speaking to your husband or listening to him, make sure that you keep eye contact. This will assure him of your attention and your respect, which is empowering to any man.
7. Plan a vacation. Make arrangements for a romantic vacation, to a destination you know your husband would love to visit.
8. Ask his family over. Your husband’s parents mean a lot to him. So ask them over for a Sunday lunch he will be touched by your loving gesture.
9. Gift your husband a subscription to his favorite magazine. 
10. On the way from work, visit the bakery and pick up a dessert your husband digs.
11. Do something he hates. Choose a chore, like buying grocery or taking out the laundry, your husband really dislikes doing and then go on to do it cheerfully.
12. Have his pals over. If a Super Bowl game or something equally popular is coming up, let your husband know he can watch it at home with his mates. Admittedly there will be beer cans and hot dog wrappers to clean up the next day, but your hubby will love your generosity.
13. Appreciate his interests. If your husband is into carpentry, praise the bookstand he has made, even if it wobbles just a wee bit. Or if he loves collecting coins, buy him a book on numismatics. Your interest in his hobbies will give your husband a feeling of pride and make him happy.
14. Book your husband on a golf vacation and do it happily.
15. Give your husband a nice massage, after a particularly exhausting day at work.
16. Make your husband a bowl, of popcorn, as he settles down to watch his favorite DVD.
17. Get him tickets to his favorite ballgame and then surprise him by lustily cheering for his favorite team.
18. Buy a really expensive gift for your husband, like a watch from Cartier or a Bvlgari perfume.
19. Don’t nag, if he gets lost while taking out the family on a road trip.
20. Send the kids to their grandparents’ or to a family member’s for a sleepover. Then snuggle up to your husband and ask what he would like to do, for the rest of the evening.
21. Find out your husband’s favorite after-shave and buy it for him.
22. Recreate your first date and your husband is sure to be happy falling in love with you all over again.
23. Tell your husband to take a night out with his pals. Not only will he have a good time, but he will also be grateful for your thoughtfulness.
24. Put on your sexiest lingerie and get ready for an intimate evening with your husband. He will be happy to know you still desire him as a lover.
25. Book yourselves on a luxury cruise. Your husband will not only enjoy the sun and the sights, but will be happiest doing nothing the whole day.
26. Gift him a customized CD by compiling around ten of your husband’s favorite songs.
27. Take care of your appearance. Don’t let yourself go, just because you’ve been married for quite a while. Your husband will be glad to know you still find him worth the effort and time it takes to appear well-groomed.
28. Greet your husband at the door dressed in your best gown and with two glasses of champagne. After he recovers from the initial shock, he will be glad that you came up with such a great idea to welcome him.
29. Tell your husband he smells nice.
30. Flirt with your husband in front of his friends. Hold his gaze, touch his legs under the table and steal quick kisses. Your hubby will love to relive the days of romance.
31. When you are sitting together, quietly slip your hand into his. Your husband will love the easy expression of intimacy between you two.
32. Buy him a set of golf clubs or whatever sport equipment he is interested in.
33. Stop trying to change your husband into someone else, after all you married him for who he is.
34. Meet him for lunch at his office and suggest a quick bite. He will love your spontaneity and the fact that you took out time from your own schedule.
35. The next time you decide to eat out, let your husband choose the restaurant and the menu.
36. Ask him to share his fantasy with you and see if you can try it out – or at least a part of it. Even if you both end up laughing, your husband will be pleased to know you care about what he wants.
37. Do something fun together like a trip to an amusement park or going for a circus show.
38. Pick up the kids from their soccer or music practice, when it is actually your husband’s turn to do so.
39. Go out after dinner. Put the kids in bed and steal away with your husband for an ice-cream for a stroll in the park. Your husband will be pleased at spending some quiet time with you.
40. Find one thing to compliment about your husband and do it sincerely.
41. Let your husband be at home the next time you want to go Christmas shopping. He will be glad to have escaped the chore and you might have more fun doing it with someone, who enjoys shopping, like your mom or a friend.
42. Remind your husband that he is the sexiest man you ever set eyes on.
43. Leave a love note in your husband’s briefcase or in the car. Just a sentence telling him that he means so much to you.
44. Pursue an interest together – like a dance class or a photography club. He will be happy to feel connected to you.
45. Go for a hike in the mountains. You both will love the fresh air and the casual intimacy.
46. Be the perfect hostess, if your husband invites his boss over for dinner.
47. Learn a skill or a new language. Your husband will be happy and proud of your achievements.
48. Get your husband something he always wanted, but never got around buying it.
49. Go over his high school photos together and remark how handsome he was even all those years back.
50. Find a quiet moment with your husband to whisper “ I love you” in his ears. If you have already said it, say it again. You can never say these three words too often and you can be sure, that every time it will make your husband glad, he married you.

 (source:futurescopes)

I want to add some more for Muslim couple

51. Perform solah 5 times per day together. Respect him as an Imam/leader in your house.

52. Keep reciting doa for your family happiness in the world and hereafter. 

53. Kissing his hand and ask forgiveness every time after solat

54.  Recite al-Quran and tafseer together because al-Quran is a guideline to make sure both of you stay happy together in Jannah insyaALLAH.  

55. Hold your husband hand when hangout with him. 

56. Keep smiling when your husband being with you and tell him you are very happy spend time with him. 

57. Welcome your husband when he coming back from work and prepare a glass of water for him.

58. Share both your happiness and sadness with him. Have a great two ways communication. Discuss any problem and find the solution together.

59. Cut his finger and toe nails. Take care of his appearance.Sometimes, pamper him by offering free spa at home. 

60. Seek knowledge non stoppable. Joining any religions class or talk together. 

Hope it can help you and me to be better and solehah wife insyaALLAH. Sayang dan cinta kerana ALLAH. Assalamua'alaikum.

080313: Antara cinta dan Air Mata

Syurga adalah tempat yang tiada air mata dan disitu lah tempat lahirnya cinta.

Tujuan ALLAH ciptakan cinta berkait rapat dengan tujuan ALLAH menciptakan manusia.

Apa tujuan ALLAH ciptakan manusia?

1. sebagai hamba ALLAH

2. menjadi khalifah di muka bumi (memakmurkan bumi ALLAH)

Apa tujuan ALLAH ciptakan cinta?

Sebagai 'alat' untuk melaksanakan kedua-dua tujuan hidup di atas.

Utamakan cinta ALLAH melebihi cinta suami isteri.

Jika kayu dan kayu disatukan dengan paku

bata dan bata disatukan dengan simen

Maka, hati dan hati disatukan dengan IMAN

Iman berkadar terus dengan cinta sesama manusia

Kerana ada hadis Nabi SAW yang berbunyi tak kan sempurna iman seandainya kita tidak mencintai saudara kita seperti kita mencintai diri kita sendiri

Law of attraction:

Nak cari sahabat/ pasangan yang baik, kita dahulu mesti menjadi baik.

Jadi seperti lilin yang menyala, yang akan menyalakan lilin lain.

Jangan mencari kebahagiaan dalam rumah tangga tetapi bawa kebahagiaan ke dalam rumah tangga.

ALLAH telah tetapkan jodoh seperti ALLAH tetapkan rezeki tetapi manusia kena mencari/berusaha.

Cara/usaha untuk mendapat pasangan yang baik

1. Jadi baik : Kita buat baik bukan kerana kita baik tetapi usaha kita untuk jadi baik.

2. Ikut pilihan atau cadangan orang yang baik

3. Ikut cara yang baik : Lelaki dan perempuan boleh mulakan dahulu tetapi dengan adab-adab Islamiah. 

Persediaan sebelum berkahwin (3A)

1. Akui : mengakui kelemahan diri sebagai seorang hamba (senantiasa beristighfar dan cari cinta ALLAH terlebih dahulu)

2. Afham (saya faham) : Faham bahawa tanggungjawab akan berpindah daripada ibu bapa kepada suami

3. Aplikasi : Mesti ada skill, teori-teori perkahwinan sebelum melangkah ke gerbang perkahwinan.

Ilmu terbahagi kepada 2 : fardhu ain (untuk menjadi hamba) dan ilmu akademik (untuk memakmurkan alam)

Ilmu itu adalah cahaya manakala cinta itu buta

Maka, ilmu lah yang akan membimbing cinta.

Rumah tangga terbahagi kepada 2 - hak dan tanggungjawab

Utamakan menjalankan tanggungjawab terhadap pasangan bagi memenuhi hak pasangan kerana what you give you will get back. 

Hukum kasih sayang: kena memberi kasih sayang dahulu, baru boleh menerima kasih sayang.

Seandainya suami yang jahat sekalipun memberi arahan yang baik, kita perlu turuti kerana tanggungjawab mendahului hak. 

Cara mengekalkan rumah tangga (SMART)

1. Setia, sayang

2. Manja

3. Adil - jangan letakkan kesangsian melebihi kepercayaan. Dalam mencari pasangan, rasa boleh dipercayai tu adalah syarat yang lebih utama berbanding  rasa cinta.

4. Renew - terima kelemahan pasangan dan upgrade kelebihan/kekuatan pasangan. Ulang buat perkara yang telah dilakukan semasa awal perkahwinan atau create aktiviti yang baru untuk dilakukan bersama-sama.

5. true colors - Pasangan akan rasa lebih dihargai seandainya psangannya berterus terang dan berbincang secara telus.

Semoga perkongsian ini bermanfaat. =) 

190712: Checklist kenduri kahwin

Panduan untuk diri sendiri juga

Renung-renungkan dan selamat beramal

090612: Celik Mata dan Jiwa Seorang Isteri

Alhamdulillah ALLAH memberi kesihatan dan 'afiat untuk saya menonton berulang kali video yang buat mata saya celik tentang perubahan besar yang akan terjadi dalam hidup saya tanggal 23 Ogos 2012 nanti. Daripada cik kepada Puan insyaALLAH. Buat mereka yang online menggunakan wifi yang block you tube, saya dengan besar hati ingin berkongsi point-point penting yang terdapat dalam video ini, untuk dijadikan ingatan pada diri saya sendiri dan semua sahabat saya yang sudi menjadi follower atau terbaca blog yang serba kekurangan ni. =)

Prof Dr Muhaya : Kadang-kadang kita ambil setahun untuk merancang majlis sehari dua hari, mencari baju, make up paling cantik, tetapi tak merancang kehidupan untuk 30 sehingga 40 tahun bersama suami.

Cara-cara menjadi isteri yang celik mata dan jiwa

1. Bersyukur : Seorang wanita perlu bersyukur apabila ada seorang lelaki sudi memperisterikan kita.

2. Tahu tujuan perkahwinan : Sunnah Rasulullah, mendapatkan anak yang soleh untuk pencen kubur (anak yang soleh mendoakan kita apabila kita berada di kubur nanti iaitu tika terputus segala amalan), merasa bahagia dan membahagiakan serta menjadi isteri solehah (meletakkan matlamat ciri-ciri isteri yang kita mahu jadi setiap hari)

Ciri isteri yang solehah

1.Menjadi isteri yang sihat- rupa paras yang cantik, menjaga kesihatan, menjaga pemakananan

2. Bijak berfikir - berfikiran positif

3. Tinggi kerohanian dengan ALLAH - Jaga aurat, solat etc.

4. Jaga hubungan dengan manusia- Terutama dengan mak mertua.

5. Menjaga kewangan- berbelanja pada tempatnya (makanan yang sihat, hadiri seminar dan beli buku. Ingat! Setiap duit yang kita belanjakan akan disoal di akhirat.

Tips Kesihatan Fizikal

Karbohidarat ada 2 jenis:-

1. indeks glikemik tinggi- bila makan, gula dalam darah naik memuncak. Bahaya! Boleh menyebabkan kencing manis.

2. indeks glikemik rendah - bila makan, gula dalam darah lambat naik

Protein : Molekul panjang. Jadi melambatkan rasa lapar. 

Air paip perlu di filter! Badan 70% terdiri daripada air. Pastikan air yang masuk dalam badan adalah air yang bersih dan selamat.

Ambil makanan tambahan : Dalam kehidupan kita yang sibuk hari ini, kita perlukan makanan tambahan.

Bersenam bersama suami dan anak-anak.

Tips Kesihatan Mental

1. Buku dan majalah apa yang kita baca? - Baca buku yang memberi solusi, memberi cara, memberi ilmu yang membangunkan diri

2. Channel TV apa yang kita pilih? - kalau hiburan semata-mata tidak membina roh

3. Berapa RM yang kita habiskan untuk membeli buku?

Kita dipengaruhi oleh buku yang kita baca, wayang yang kita tengok, orang yang kita jumpa, berita yang kita lihat dan TV yang kita tonton.

Apabila berjumpa suami/anak-anak/mak mertua/sesiapa sahaja

1. Menghargai

2. Sebut kebaikan mereka

3. Elak kritik

Kena jaga 4 perkara dengan suami:

1. Jaga mata suami - bmesti cantik selalu

2. Jaga hidung suami - elakkan badan berbau, buat dental floss selalu

3. Jaga telinga suami - cakap perkara-perkara yang baik

4. Jaga hati, perasaan dan jiwa suami - elak menyakiti hatinya

Semoga beroleh manfaat.=)
Assalamua'alaikum

220512 : Be positive!

Assalamua'laikum

Today, I would like to introduce the popular positive thinker and speaker in Malaysia, Prof Dr Muhaya [Click her name and please like her page if you want to be like her]. I love and admire her so much. So many useful knowledge and tips came out from her mouth when she giving a talk. To be honest, I am trying hard right now to be as positive as I can. Please pray for me yah.=) Oh ya as always, I want to share something from her page here. 

"Senyum suatu sunnah dan akan menghasilkan hormon endorphins bila kita senyum. Hanya manusia boleh senyum dan haiwan tidak dapat senyum. Jangan fikir apa orang kata. Walau orang tak senyum balik kita dah dapat pahala sunnah. Senyum yang benar benar niat sunnah akan diterima dengan baik insyaALLAH. Nabi Muhammad SAW tidak akan berkata kata sebelum baginda senyum dulu. Jom jadikan senyum suatu amalan dan tabiat. Ajar anak-anak senyum bila bangun pagi. Sesiapa yang masam dan kata moody bila bangun, bayangkan bagaimana hari yang dimulakan dengan muka masam. Ubah tabiat ubah kehidupan." (Prof Dr Muhaya)

Assalamua'laikum

020512: Panduan buat isteri dan bakal isteri

Bismillah

ALLAH SWT, in his infinite wisdom and mercy, created the bonds of marriage as a permissible, enjoyable means of uniting two strangers to live with each other in love and peace. Theoretically this exists, but sadly the reality is that it isn't always maintained and many Muslim marriages are breaking down.

Everyone demanding their rights yet they fail to think from the other angle and neglect to fulfill rights of others. When a situation becomes very black and white, people forget the essence of Islam; justice, forgiveness and humility. These qualities are lost in an argument and so a cold war ensues between husband and wife.

Keeping the line with rights, the greatest right of a woman is to be treated with kindness, but on the other hand the greatest right a husband has over the wife is respect. Anger and displaying angry behavior is a very disrespectful way of behaving with someone. Similarly provoking and angering the husband tantamount to disrespect. Marital breakdown is usually a consequence of anger and acting upon anger in hastiness.

In order for a wife to respect her husband she must first understand and avoid factors that anger him. Anger manifests itself in different ways but it tends to have a deeper underlying cause. A wife must try to decipher what the root cause of the anger is before any solutions can be reached. The following are a few reasons as to what can anger a husband, ranging from minor to major cause:

• Hunger - Hunger can make someone very irritable and short tempered. A husband expects food to be ready when he comes home from work. This may seem insignificant, but if this happens regularly then it might be an indication of his displeasure at his wife's time management/organisational skill and lack of consideration.
• Neglecting children and household duties - A wife may have commitments elsewhere, eg. work, dakwah activities, personal hobbies. As a result, children or managing the household is neglected. This indicates that your husband may be displeased with your priorities and may want you to reassess your commitments.
• Work/money problems - Finance can usually cause a huge strain on marriages, and the pressure of being the breadwinner can take its toll. However, if the wife is oblivious to the husbands situation and spends endlessly then this means she doesn't acknowledge his effort and is abusing his generosity. Alternately the husband may be having problems at work that he can't discuss with his wife, leading to feelings of inadequacy and fear of redundancy. 
• Family problem - He may be having problems with his own family which he can't tell you about, but which affect him deeply. Being in the dark will only make you question and misunderstand and it may anger him at your lack of sensitivity.
• Mistreating someone he loves - You may not have showed good conduct or hurt someone who he loves and respects, such as his family members or close friends. Your words/actions may or may not have been intentional, but someone was hurt by it and informed your husband, thereby causig him hurt and anger.
• Hurting him with previous words/actions - Maybe you had said or did something quite a long time ago that really hurt him, but which he didn't mention at the time. Consequently he had let the issue grow and took his anger randomly out on you at a later point.
• Making him feel inferior - You might be a very confident, successful person, who is good at multitasking. If you are arrogant in your approach then this will convey through your words/actions that you have no need for him or be undermining his authority. To him it may indicate your lack of gratefulness and recognition of his qualities and capabilities.
• Committed a sin/not doing Fard duties - You may be committing a grave sin that your husband may or may not be aware of, but punishment is such that it can indirectly affect your marriage, particularly if a woman unchaste. Alternately you may not be doing your fard obligations e.g. salah, not observing proper hijab or engaging in unislamic activities, music, dance, etc.
• Socialising/going out too much - Your husband might dislike who you socialize with or that you socialize too often. He may think that you're taking advantage of his leniency or that you're never available when he wants you to be. This may result in neglecting him and the household. Husbands have a sense of gheerah (exclusivity/possessiveness) so he might feel this is infringed if you go out so often.
• Not fulfilling his desires - You may be not fulfilling his desire properly or refusing to do so altogether. This can lead to frustration and anger, as well as a cause for him to look elsewhere.
• Not allowing him to spend sufficient time with children/family - You have a problem with him spending significant amounts of time with the children or you deny him access to children (if separate), or you dislike him spending time with his own family or someone else he is close to.

These are only a few suggestions, there are of course many more which are unique to each marriage. This is in no way suggesting that men are blameless in these scenarios, rather it is a step towards understanding why we blame them. Neither should women feel that it is biased towards men as it just presents one side, it is general advice for women as a whole to try and understand from the other angle. To present from the woman's angle would have to be discussed as a separate issue.

Wives should bear the following advice in mind when trying to resolve a problem. Understand to the best of your ability what the problem is, accept where you have gone wrong even if it may be hard to. Have the most sincere of intentions to please ALLAH and your husband, do plenty of nafl (optional salat), and recite often and earnestly make dua that ALLAH SWT gives you patience and understanding. Pray that ALLAH reunites your hearts and brings you closer. If ones husband is still angry, apart from seeking help, try reminding your husband of the following ayahs by either reciting it or placing somewhere respectable he would be able to frequently see it.

"And live with them (women) in a beautiful manner. If then you are displeased with them (then know) perhaps you dislike something. Wherein ALLAH has created abundant goodness in it." (Surah An Nisa 4:19)

"Who repress anger... Who pardons men... Verily ALLAH loves AL-Muhsinun (the good doers) (Surah AL Imran 3:134)

copied from Muslim Husband & Wife

Wife to be and also women who already called wife.. Please like the facebook's page stated above. RECOMMENDED!!! So many info relate to married life there. Membaca jambatan ilmu! Jom tambah ilmu! =D

170412 : Lavish wedding

'Lavish wedding where much money is splashed, extravagance is clear, religious rules are blatantly disregarded, the poor are not invited and people forget that it is meant to be sacred union and a gift of the Almighty, cannot bear much blessings and can even return to haunt the families later on. 

The most blessed of all weddings are those full of simplicity where religious rules are given prime importance and the whole function considered a spiritually filled celebration of a sacred gift of the Almighty.

The type of seed sown is determined by the type of wedding we have, How can we expect to reap beneficial fruit when we chose to sow the seeds of cactus?

The sad reality is that people incur debts to hire lavish venues in order to live up to the Jones. They then suffer paying back whilst the food has long been digested, the function outdone by another and at times the divorce already taken place. 

Remember, you can never achieve pleasure through the displeasure of the Owner of eternal Pleasure.

The Almighty, who gave us this day of happiness will indeed be unhappy if we choose to express our happiness through sin.

Let us seriously take heed for the future and repent for what has passed by.'

Quoted from Mufti Ismail Menk's facebook

Psssssttttt a simple reminder for me and my lovely friends who read this post. Please like his page. InsyaALLAH so many input you will gain from his page. =) 

061211: Forum Sampaikan Aku Pada Dia

Semalam tanpa dirancang kaki menongkah arus malas menuju bumi Kolej Tun Syed Nasir UKM Kampus Kuala Lumpur. Hayunan kaki dan tangan beriringan menuju Dewan Serbaguna bagi menghadiri Forum Sampaikan Aku Pada Dia. Panel-panel yang hebat yakni Ustazah Fatimah Syarha dan Ustaz Zaidi (Mantan BADAR UKM KKL) membulatkan niat meredah gelap malam menuntut ilmu. Ilmu yang diperoleh bersesuaian untuk dikongsi di blog ini berbanding satu lagi blog saya kerana isu CINTA tempatnya disini.=) Saya tak mahu menjadi panelis ketiga disini. Cukup berkongsi sedikit ilmu yang sempat ditangkap hati. 

Pelbagai faktor menggalakkan wujudnya blog B2B. Kebanyakan orang mesti setuju antara faktornya adalah untuk berkongsi persiapan dan idea sebelum bertukar status Cik kepada Puan. Tetapi saban kali fokus blog B2B hanya berkitar kepada persiapan luaran. Jarang sekali kita berkongsi tentang persiapan diri. Apa persiapan diri itu?

1. Fokus mencari ilmu. Ilmu itu luas. Pencarian ilmu mempersiap diri menjadi pemimpin dan PA (personal asisstant) pemimpin pada negara rumah tangga.
2. Memperbaiki akhlak.

3. Menjaga hubungan dengan ALLAH iaitu cuba mengatur masa untuk perkara bermanafaat pada kita. Berjaga-jaga lah supaya cinta kita pada seseorang atau sesuatu tidak menyamai/melebihi cinta kita pada Pencipta atau dengan kata lain CINTA MENSYIRIKKAN ALLAH. nauzubillahiminzalik semoga kita terhindar dari perbuatan itu. Letakkan cinta ALLAH diatas. Andai kita sanggup luangkan 3jam bersama bakal suami/suami. Gandakan masa kita untuk ALLAH. Kekalkan cinta agung itu yang utama. 

Ketiga-tiga aspek ini penting kerana janji ALLAH

"Perempuan yang baik adalah untuk laki-laki yang baik, Perempuan yang jahat untuk laki-laki yang jahat" (24:26)

Mari menjadi baik supaya jodoh kita menjadi lebih baik juga. Bukankah matlamat kita cinta hingga ke syurga.Ayuh persiapkan diri.=)